[Grocery Review] Smart Ones Mini-Cheeseburgers

Purchased at: Murphy’s Food Mart, Kentland, IN
Cost: $3.79
Size: Two burgers per box
Reviewed by: Casual Clay Cunningham

I know what you’re thinking: “Wow, a low fat cheeseburger you cook in the microwave? Even though I will no doubt break both my legs on the never ending puddle of saliva which will flow from my mouth at the mere thought of these, I will crawl on my belly through any terrain long before I even contemplate the idea of seeking medical attention!”

And I must admit this uber-sarcastic school of thought had me cursing myself the second I stepped out of the grocery store with a box of these in hand. But while I was initially excited about writing another one of my angry, cynical rants about bad food, to my surprise, this new entry from Smart Ones really isn’t deserving of my scorn.


The burgers come two-to-a-box and prepare in about 45 seconds. One thing it has going for it was that the heat did seem to spread itself out fairly proportionally, which is a problem I’ve had with Smart Ones meals in the past (though in fairness, the microwave I frequently use pre-dates the horseless carriage).

And taste-wise, well, let’s just put it this way. Out of skepticism, I made mine one at a time, and the first one, at the very least, was good enough for me to proceed with the second.

It tastes ok. Hardly something you’d kill for, but the cheese tastes like actual cheese, and the meat, while hardly high grade, doesn’t succumb to the leathery unpleasantness a product like this no doubt could struggle with.

One gripe I had was the price. Mine came in at $3.79, far greater than the price you are likely to pay for a similar product at a fast food restaurant. Now I did get mine at a locally run grocery chain whose prices are normally pretty high, but I still think these could have been made available for far less than $4.

Does It Hit The Spot?

For what it is, I’d say yes. When dealing with microwavable foods, you are essentially working with a ceiling that is about six inches high, and by these remarkably low standards, this product is a success.

For a quick fix lunchtime product, you can do a whole hell of a lot worse. Plus, you aren’t left with the nasty, fresh-out-of-the-mop bucket sogginess one experiences at the disgusting and inexplicably popular White Castle, so that too is an advantageous feature for Smart Ones to push.

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16 Responses to “[Grocery Review] Smart Ones Mini-Cheeseburgers”

  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Everyview, Caffeine A Holic. Caffeine A Holic said: RT @Everyview: New food review! http://www.doesithitthespot.com/?p=314 Smart Ones Mini-Cheeseburgers […]

  2. Xaquiri Daiquiri says:

    I can’t believe you’re going to dis on White Castle, and instead endorse these homoerotic microwaveable samwiches.

  3. Davincivirus says:

    Market Basket a budget chain of grocery stores has a big bag of mini sliders for cheaper than one of those, lols

  4. Mike says:

    They taste fine, but honestly the calorie count on these isn’t all that great. They’re pretty small for 200 calories, two of these at 400 calories is still probably less burger than 1 McDonalds cheeseburger at 300 calories. Again, not bad, but not really good diet food.

  5. […] the full review on DIHTS.com! This entry was posted in Food & Drink and tagged diet, Food, frozen food, Review, smart ones […]

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    i came across this searching for “broken legs.” great tagging.

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    These are AWESOME!!!

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