Purchased at: Taco Bell
Reviewed by: Xaquiri Daiquiri
I just ate a Quad Steak Burrito, the new menu item from Taco Bell. Advertised as their largest burrito ever, this beefy behemoth is loaded with four portions of Taco Bell’s new and improved steak, marinated and seasoned to glorious sodium overdose-inducing perfection, as well as some seasoned rice, sour cream, fire-roasted salsa, and cheddar cheese. Sounds bad for you, doesn’t it?
Honestly “bad for you” doesn’t even begin the Quad Steak Burrito. Get this; Taco Bell’s Quad Steak Burrito weighs in at an astounding 690 calories, 26 grams of fat, 12 grams of saturated fat, 2,210 mg sodium, 72 g carbs, 100 mg cholesterol, 5 g fiber, 41g protein. It’s certainly not the worst thing you can put in your mouth, but it’s still pretty bad, especially that 2,210 mg of sodium.
How do I feel now that I’ve downed an entire Quad Steak Burrito? Well, in a word I feel full. However, I also feel tired, fat, groggy, gassy, and lethargic. What’s even more important is what I’m not feeling: the left half of my body.
No, really. Heart attacks are nothing to joke about. Haha.
Anyway, the entire point of this review is to let you know let you know whether or not the Quad Steak Burrito is good. And, really, I shouldn’t have to answer that question. I’m not saying that it’s a stupid question, because there’s no such thing, but honestly. Think about it for yourself for a second. It is a giant burrito from Taco Bell loaded with a shit ton of steak. Let’s walk through this:
1. Do you like Taco Bell?
If you answered yes to that question, please continue to question two. If you answered no, please put down your pencils and go on about your day.
2. Are you a vegetarian?
If you answered yes to that question, thank you for participating, but there’s no reason for you to be here. Good luck enjoying your life decision to eat what food eats, instead of food itself.
If you made it through the questionnaire above without me asking you to leave this site or criticizing your lifestyles for no justifiable reason whatsoever, then I’m pretty sure you’re going to enjoy the Quad Steak Burrito. There’s no reason you wouldn’t. It’s Taco Bell’s delicious marinated steak, a wonderfully smokey salsa, cool sour cream, and scrumptious seasoned rice, wrapped in a tortilla and given to you to eat. If that’s not your thing, then I don’t know what is.
If there was one complaint I would make about the Quad Steak Burrito is that it’s $4.99 for the burrito alone. While that is certainly fair, considering this is four portions of their steak, I think Taco Bell could easily charge $3.99 and I’d be much more happy with it. It’s not like this is a permanent menu item anyway, so they wouldn’t be losing potential profit for too long.
Does It Hit The Spot?
As far as I’m concerned, not only does it hit the spot, it destroys it. It’s big enough to satisfy even the hungriest of eaters, it’s got enough meat to satisfy any cow craving, and it’s tasty enough to make it worth ingesting something so ridiculously bad for you. It’s not perfect, and you might feel like shit when you’ve eaten all of it, but it’s still something satisfying and delicious to eat. If you love Taco Bell and steak, definitely give it a shot before it’s gone.